You may wonder why I have explained how the breasts produce milk before addressing their functioning during sex, since this is a website about sexuality. Believe it or not, I have explained the functioning of the breasts during sex in the process. It is common today to say the female breasts have two functions or roles in a woman's life, one is sexual and the other is maternal. This is not an accurate statement to make as the breasts work the same during sex and lactation. It is the breast's ability to feed our children that makes them capable of producing sexual pleasure.
There is no magic switch that changes the role of the breasts from sexual to maternal. I realize many women, and men, believe there is, but there definitely is not. This belief has resulted in women being at odds with, and at times embarrassed by, their breasts. When a woman nurses her baby she expects her breasts to respond and feel "different" from when her partner sexually stimulates her. She may not expect to feel "sexual" pleasure when her baby nurses even though this is often the case. If you acknowledge the breasts have only one function or role in a woman's life, it will be easier to understand their role and function during sex and lactation.
Why are the nipples so often very sensitive to touch? The likely answer is, to reward a mother for nursing her children. Nature has built in a means of positive reinforcement that encourages women to breast-feed their children. It may not be instinct alone that compels women to care for their children. In addition, the uterine contractions resulting from nipple stimulation serve to cause the uterus to shrink rapidly in size, perhaps allowing the mother to be better prepared to care for and protect her newborn baby. It just so happens that orgasms also involve uterine contractions. The connection between nipple stimulation, sexual arousal, and orgasm some women experience is no accident and its primary purpose is not sexual, even though that is how it frequently benefits a woman. Keep in mind it is society that has defined it as sexual versus maternal. There is a reason for why our body functions as it does, that reason is not always in agreement with what society expects of it.
A study by Masters and Johnson found amongst a group of twenty four women who nursed their baby for at least two months, their desire for sex returned at a faster rate than it did for the women who did not, they often experienced sexual arousal to the plateau stage, and three experienced orgasm while nursing. As mentioned above, the let-down reflex can cause some pretty intense sensations and there is the aforementioned chemical and electrical connection between the nipples and uterus.
Unfortunately, at least one American woman has ended up in jail as a result of admitting to experiencing "sexual" sensations while nursing her baby. She called a "help-line" to find out if she was "normal" and found herself in jail and her baby taken from her instead. While the woman did eventually regain her freedom and custody of her baby, it was very traumatizing for them both I'm sure. A woman mentioned to me several years ago how her baby daughter was having trouble nursing. She attributed this difficulty with the baby girl perhaps becoming aware that female-female intimacy was considered inappropriate. I have to wonder if it was not actually the mother who was uncomfortable with the sexual sensations she was experiencing while nursing her "daughter" that caused the difficulties. This illustrates how people's misconceptions regarding women's breasts are having a significant and negative impact on women's lives, and as a result their children's.
The sensitivity of a woman's breasts to stimulation varies considerably from one woman to the next. There are women who find their breasts extremely sensitive to their own and/or a lover's touch, while just as many do not experience any pleasant sensations at all. The reasons for this are thought to be both physiological and psychological in nature. Some women have more sensory nerve endings located in their nipples and breasts than others. A woman's relationship with her breasts also has an influence on their perceived sensitivity. If she likes her breasts and has a positive relationship with them she is more open to the physical sensations they produce. As a result she is likely to perceive those sensations in a positive manner. If a woman does not like her breasts, for whatever reason, she is less open to and hence less aware of any sensations they may produce. If she is aware of any sensations she is less likely to perceive them as pleasurable. A woman's menstrual cycle often influences the sensitivity of her breasts, many experience periods of breast tenderness that makes any sexual stimulation unbearable. The sensitivity of the breasts to stimulation may flip-flop during pregnancy and nursing because of physical and physiological changes a woman experiences during this time. A mother may experience orgasm while her baby nurses yet finds her breasts are insensitive to her partner's stimulation fifteen minutes later, or vise versa. As a result, there is no one rule that applies to all women regarding breast sensitivity.
The connection between breast stimulation, sexual arousal, and genital sensations some women experience is the result of the electrical and chemical connections mentioned above. These chemicals are released during nipple stimulation regardless of whether a teen or woman has ever been pregnant or nursed before. This is demonstrated by the fact that some women's breasts always produce a little bit of milk, starting at puberty, and by women who breast-feed adopted babies. If a woman engages in frequent nipple stimulation, simulating having a newborn baby nursing at her breast, she will likely start to lactate. A woman does not have to find her breasts sensitive to stimulation for this to occur. Some of our physical responses are hard wired and out of our control.
The size of a woman's breasts has no bearing on whether she enjoys having them sexually stimulated. Since breasts have become sexual objects in Western society, large breasts have become symbols of greater sexuality. A woman with large breasts is often seen as being more sexual than a woman with small breasts, and she is expected to be inherently more sexual as a result. Unfortunately, women with small breasts may have them overlooked by their partner because of this false expectation, and women with large breasts may find their breasts receiving too much attention. Despite this expectation, large breasts are not more likely to be sensitive to sexual stimulation; recent studies have found women with large breasts have less nipple and breast sensation than women with small breasts, perhaps because the nerve endings are distributed over a larger area. Keep in mind that a woman's emotional relationship with her breasts probably plays a larger part in whether she "enjoys" having them stimulated than their actual sensitivity to physical stimulation. A woman's partner should be careful not to judge her breast's sensitivity, or her enjoyment of breast stimulation, based solely on their size.
How do you stimulate a woman's breasts and nipples? That depends on the individual woman but gently is perhaps the best way. Women often enjoy having their breasts lavished with love, which means gentle licks, nibbles, and caresses with lips, tongue, and fingers. Stimulate her entire breast, not just the nipple. Take your time. Get some body lotion or oil and massage it into her breasts. Her genitals may respond to breast stimulation, if they do, it is a good way to prolong sexual pleasure. While she is not likely to experience orgasm as the result of breast stimulation alone, it may be intensely enjoyable for her. Be aware of her menstrual cycle if she experiences breast tenderness. (Keeping a menstrual calendar is a good idea for women who need to keep their partner informed of cyclic changes in their body.) Be aware that there are women who need clitoral and nipple stimulation simultaneously in order to experience orgasm.
There are women who enjoy intense if not painful breast stimulation, but such stimulation needs to be discussed prior to trying it. This enjoyment of intense stimulation may have more to do with the release of the hormones oxytocin and prolactin than with an enjoyment of pain itself. Hormones released during sex often increase a person's pain tolerance though. Intense stimulation of her nipples may result in a surge in the production of these hormones that may have a significant affect on her genitals. Some women discover they like for their breasts to be treated roughly while masturbating, and they can inform and instruct their partner how and when to do it correctly. Do not treat a woman's breasts like loaves of dough you are kneading or bite her breasts or nipples, unless she consents to this type of stimulation. Some women do enjoy this, but it is not something all women enjoy, and even those who do need to be in the right frame of mind if they are to enjoy it.
A woman's breasts are often extremely important to her so she may enjoy having them stimulated even if it is not physically enjoyable for her. Her partner's enjoyment and acceptance of her breasts may be very meaningful to her emotionally. This is why it is important not to neglect a woman's breasts, dashing past them on your way to her vulva and vagina. Some women do put their breasts off limits for emotional reasons; the most common is insecurity about their size. Women with small breasts who wear padded or push-up bras may be reluctant reveal their true size to their partner. Padded or push-up bras, worn daily, are about as good for sexual intimacy as is faking orgasm.
Everyone prefers large breasts right? Wrong. Yes, large breasts are sexual symbols and they receive an enormous amount of attention, but they are not equally loved by all. First size is relative. For some large breasts are anything larger than AA and for others small is anything smaller than DD. Mathematically B/C is average. Of course in our competitive world no one wants to be average or below average. We, especially women, base their pass or fail as a woman solely on the size of their breasts. Unfortunately we often equate AA with an F-, and DD with an A+. This leads to a lot of misjudgment of women, and women of themselves.
What size do guys and gals really prefer? Well, it really does depend on the individual. Contrary to what many magazines report, a person's preference does not change every other month. One study found twenty five percent of men preferred large breasts, the same percentage preferred small breasts. The remaining fifty percent preferred other physical attributes, or had no preferences. Some are attracted to a woman's nipples, especially when they are large and erect. Others prefer women with little or no breast development, more than you would expect.
It has been my experience that men find women attractive for many reasons, but breast size is often of little importance. In fact, the majority of the women my male co-workers have found very attractive and desirable just happened to have small breasts. Talking to the women whom these men found attractive, I sometimes discovered they did not feel they were attractive, often because they judged their desirability solely on the size of their breasts. This was even true of some women who had men lining up to date them. What is attractive in a woman is a complex picture and depends on the individual. Large breasts often receive a lot of attention, but not necessarily women with large breasts. There is a difference!
If large breasts are not a big deal, then why do they receive so much attention? For the most part it is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Society, specifically the mass media, says they are better so they are. We are programmed to notice and admire large breasts. While we notice breasts of all sizes, we respond to them differently. We are expected to respond to large breasts, and often do so openly. Actresses and models with large breasts receive a lot of attention, and their breasts receive equal attention, because it is expected. Equally famous women with small breasts receive the same amount of attention, but in a different way, their breasts usually are not mentioned or emphasized. As a group, the breasts of these women are overlooked simply because they are small. At present the number of popular actresses and models with small breasts greatly out numbers those with large breasts, we simply have been conditioned not to notice.
In some cases those we expect or envision as having large breasts actually do not. This is especially true of super models like Cindy Crawford and Kathy Ireland. They are super models so we expect them to have super sized breasts, when in reality they have average sized breasts. We have often been fooled by push-up bras and strategically placed tape, hands, or arms. We often force reality to conform to our expectations.
What about all the large breasted women in porn you ask? With all the surgically enhanced breasts in the adult entertainment business today you would expect everyone to prefer large breasts. I believe the key point here is that we are talking about sex. Large breasts are seen as more sexual so women with large breasts are seen as more sexual and as a result as having a greater sexual capacity. Sex attracts sex. On the surface it may seem pretty cut and dry, but really it is not. Popular "men's magazines" often feature large breasts; so large breasts must be the most popular right? Wrong, all it means is, of those willing to buy a men's magazine, more prefer large breasts than small breasts, or simply do not care about the size of the model's breasts. What about all those men and women who do not buy magazines, or videos? In actually, even the most popular men's magazine is bought by only a small percentage of the population. The sales of men's magazines and adult videos are not an accurate method of measuring what men, or women consider desirable.
The Internet has had a major impact on what people have access to as far as sexually explicit material. Since it is a private affair a person can express their desires and wishes openly. As a result, many women with small breasts, as well as those with large breasts, have received a lot of attention. In some cases women with little or no breast development have posted pictures expecting no one to notice them. They were seeking approval, but they got much more. They found men and women who desired them because of their small breasts, not in spite of them. The women were often shocked to learn this because during their entire life up to that point they have been told they could not be found desirable. Now there are women who are famous because of their small breasts and have a large and supportive following. At least one website that predominately features women who have small breasts has gotten tens of millions of visits, not to mention tons of money, as a result. If one broadens their perspective, they will find there is no disadvantage to having small or even tiny breasts. A woman is only as attractive as she feels she is, or more importantly, allows herself to be. It is more an issue of self-confidence than it is breast size.
Scholarly people have often tried to explain why human females are the only mammals to have breasts that are prominent features even when they are not lactating. In all other species the breasts only develop during pregnancy and lactation, not during puberty. There is no apparent benefit. If a woman's breasts do not develop during puberty, she is still able to produce sufficient quantities of milk to provide for her children. Educated men have proposed women have prominent breasts as the result of natural or sexual selection. The believe is that since women with large breasts are considered more desirable they would have more suitors and as a result reproduce more often. The problem with this concept is it is based solely on modern Western society's ideals of what is considered attractive. It over looks the fact that breast size has seldom been of major importance in most societies. In the majority of societies breasts are just a source of nourishment for infants and young children. I have never heard of an instance where a woman with small breasts could not or would not be able find a partner. I believe the reason why women's breasts usually develop during puberty is likely the side affect of some biological necessity that is not readily apparent. Perhaps it is simply that human females experience a greater increase in estrogen levels during puberty than do other mammals. Most of the time, a breast is simply a breast.
