Back to Part 1 - Nerves & Erogenous Zones
Back to Part 2 - Orgasmic Pathways
Note: As important as nerves and our senses are to our daily lives and very existence, it is surprising and frustrating to discover how little we know about them, especially where they relate to female sexuality. Even outside the realm of sex, research conducted decades ago is often the basis on which today's publications are based. Most references provide general information that doesn't provide any details, and the information that is provided is sometimes conflicting, but never the less I have done my best to be as detailed and accurate as possible. For our purposes, the accuracy of the details is less important than the realization of how complex our sense of touch is, and the many possible ways of stimulating our erogenous zones. If one form of stimulation doesn't work, there are many others we can try.
One Size Does Not Fit All
We are instructed to stimulate our own or a partner's erogenous zones to produce sexual pleasure, arousal, and/or orgasm, but we usually aren't told specifically how to do so. We are advised to caress, lick, or apply a vibrator to a specific area of the body and expect guaranteed results. The assumption is that all caresses, licks, and vibrators are the same, which they are not. This assumption often leaves people in the dark. If a suggested technique doesn't work, we don't know if the cause is related to the individual being stimulated, with the means of providing the stimulation, or the suggested technique itself. Given the diversity in women's sexual nervous systems, no single technique will work equally well for all, but with slight adaptations, they may work for many more than they would otherwise.
The Different Types of Stimulation
We likely never consider the types of sensations the human body can experience, and ways of producing them during our sexual activities. Our skin and mucous membranes are sensitive to several types of stimulation. They are sensitive to light touch, pressure, vibration, temperature, and pain. The sensation produced by each type of stimulus is detected by a specific type of sensory receptor, or sensor. When these sensors are exposed to a specific type of stimulation, they cause electrical and chemical messengers to travel down our nerves, and through our spinal cord, to our brain. Our brain then interprets these signals and we perceive the stimulation on a conscious or subconscious level. Our brain tells us the location, type, and intensity of the stimulation we are being exposed to, and we react accordingly, or our brain simply responds without our knowing.
If a form of stimulation reaches a specific level or threshold of intensity a messenger is sent down a nerve and it continues on its journey until it reaches its destination, the spinal cord and/or brain. The intensity of the stimulation is indicated by the number of messengers traveling down the nerve. The stronger the stimulation the greater the number of messengers there are arriving at the brain. The greater the number of nerves that are transporting messengers also indicates the intensity of the stimulation, and the size of the area affected. Each type of sensor has a different threshold, and if the stimulation never reaches the threshold we do not feel the stimulation. You can certainly be stimulated without knowing it, as many women can relate to during their sexual experiences. If a portion of the body, say the inner vagina, is being stimulated in a way in which it doesn't have the appropriate type of sensors to detect it, in this case light touch sensors, you will not and cannot feel it. Once a threshold has been reached it doesn't gain anything by providing more intense stimulation, as in pressing harder, and will simply activate the pain sensors.
Preventing a Sensory Overload
To prevent a sensory overload many of the sensors send signals to our brain only when they are first exposed to a stimulus, and when it is later removed, which is a process called adaptation. These sensors are only sensitive to changes in our environment. We would be overwhelmed if we were conscious of every form of stimulus we are being exposed to at this very moment. The sensors that stop sending messengers after the onset of the stimulation are considered rapidly adapting. A couple examples of adaptation are how we only feel our cloths when we first put them on, and why a hot shower is the hottest when we first get in. This explains why we are most often sensitive to rhythmic stimulation of our erogenous zones, and is why the masturbation techniques that most girls and women develop involve the rapid and rhythmic stimulation of one or more erogenous zones. Almost all forms of sexual stimulation involve rhythmic motion for this reason, the exception being those involving the creation of muscle tension in the legs and pelvis(1).
Sensitivity to Stimulation
The distribution of these sensors is not constant throughout the body. Some areas, like the fingertips, lips, and external genitals have a higher concentration of sensors and are therefore very sensitive to stimulation. Other areas have very few sensors and are relatively less sensitive to touch. The type of sensors within a given area of the body vary too, and as a result the sensitivity to a given type of stimulation also varies.
The brain and reflex arcs ultimately determine whether a given area of the body is an erogenous zone rather than its nerve density and the types of sensors present; though this is certainly an important factor. It seems possible that some erogenous zones could be created through childhood experiences that alter the nervous pathways of the brain rather than strictly by how things are hardwired at birth.
The following illustration provides an indication of the sensitivity of different areas of the body. The longer a blue bar graph line is, the LESS sensitive the area is. The fingers are typically the most sensitive and the calf least sensitive. Unfortunately, the vulva and nipples are not represented in this illustration.
The Different Types of Sensors
The following illustration provides an indication of where the different types of sensors are located within the skin, how close they are to the surface. The closer they are to the surface the more sensitive they tend to be to stimulation, with the exception of the pain receptors, and the more quickly they adapt and stop sending messengers to the brain. The epidermis is the outer layer of skin that you can see and varies in thickness from 0.002 to 0.06 inches (0.05mm to 1.5 mm) and the next layer of skin, the dermis, is 0.01 to 0.10 inches (0.3 to 3.0 mm) thick. To provide a frame of reference, the graphite material in a standard wooden pencil is about 0.06 inches (1.6 mm) thick. The skin covering the clitoris and vulva are likely very thin, and this is why women usually find firm pressure in these areas uncomfortable or painful.
The sensory receptors we are interested in knowing about are the:
Nocicepters, i.e. free nerve endings/pain receptors
Merkel Disks
Meissner Corpuscles
Ruffini Corpuscles
Hair Root Plexus, i.e. network
Pacinian Corpuscles
Note: Corpuscles are nerve endings that are surrounded by connective tissues, which tend to make them more sensitive to touch, compared to the free nerve endings.
The Types of Stimulation We are Sensitive Too
The following table describes the types of sensations we experience when we are exposed to varying types of stimulation, whether the sensors adapt quickly, their relative threshold, and their locations on the body. It is not necessary to know or memorize this information, as the critical information will be presented below.
Methods of Sexual Stimulation
As a result of there being different types of sensors at varying depths within the skin, and varying amounts of adaptation, there are many ways of stimulating erogenous zones, and a few of them are listed below. Each technique presented can be altered by changing the amount of pressure applied, the frequency of the motion, and/or the temperature of the stimulus, and by intentionally turning on or off the adaptive sensors. You can increase the amount of stimulation by combining different types of stimulation that individually stimulate a specific type of sensor. When trying to find something that works you must use your imagination and dream up new ways of stimulating potential erogenous zones. There isn't a right or wrong way of doing so, as long as no harm is being done in the process, but it helps to keep in mind the limits of the sensors involved. This process of exploration is likely to be time consuming, so don't expect instantaneous results, it may happen, but don't be discouraged if it doesn't; you can't explore every possible type of stimulation in a night, week, or month.
Stimulate the Hair Follicles:
If there is hair present, you can caress, blow on, and gently tug on the hair to stimulate the hair root networks. If the stimulation of the hair doesn't disturb the surrounding skin then you have isolated one type of sensor. Lightly stroking a woman's pubic hair without touching her skin may provide a very pleasant sensation and increase her arousal. Gently blowing on the hair covering different areas of her body may have the same affect. The key point is, don't overlook hair as a possible means of stimulating erogenous zones.
Directly Stimulate the Skin:
Shaving the skin of the underarms, legs, and vulva may expose the shallow and highly sensitive sensors of the underlying skin to stimulation, as hair may act as a barrier to frictional stimulation. When hair is present your fingers are in contact with the hair rather than the skin, and the pressure required for you or her to feel the stimulation through this hair may turn off the shallow adaptive sensors. This may explain why many women report their vulva is much more sensitive to stimulation when they shave their pubic hair. Shaving is not an acceptable possibility for all women, though laser hair removal may be a somewhat expensive yet suitable alternative for some women who desire the permanent removal of body hair.
Experiment with Different Pressures:
Lightly caressing the surface of the skin in a rhythmic motion will stimulate the shallow adaptive sensors. Pressing a littler firmer will stimulate the deeper sensors, again using a rhythmic motion. You don't need to press hard, or even firm, because, as pointed out above, our skin is relatively thin. By applying firm pressure you may be crushing the skin and activating the pain sensors rather than the tactile ones. Some women don't like light touch, so you may have to apply a little pressure to tune out the shallow sensors. As a woman's level of sexual arousal increases her pain threshold increases, but this may not affect the sensitivity of the other types of sensors.
Change the Speed of Your Movements:
The rate at which your fingers and hands move across the skin will influence the amount of stimulation she experiences. A very fast flutter stroke may provide the most intense stimulation. I have had women respond very favorably to a very fast flutter stoke when I was stimulating their lubricated clitoris and vulva, utilizing very light pressure; your hand glides across the surface of the skin. This sensitivity to a very fast strokes may relate to our sensors being most sensitive to vibrations in the range of 200 cycles (times) per second. You want your hand to become like a living vibrator, but your arm is unlikely to have the endurance of a vibrator, so use other techniques to get her aroused before utilizing this form of stimulation, as she nears orgasm; if this technique doesn't work don't worry about it.
Use Different Forms of Lubrication:
Try using different types of lubricants. Some lubricants are thin while others are thick, and each will alter the affects of your stimulation. Go into the kitchen and locate your vegetable and olive oils, shortening, butter, and margarine, or buy them at the store, and explore their consistency. As long as they aren't used internally, as inside the vagina, and condoms will not be used during the sexual experience, these items will more than likely be safe to use on the skin of the body, as they are all edible; unless there is a food allergy to consider. Please note that some of these items may stain clothing and bedding so you may want to lay down protective towels. You can also use different types of water-based sexual lubricants, if you want to incorporate internal vaginal stimulation or will be using a condom. I suggest using natural oils and the like because they are readily available to all and inexpensive to buy. The natural lubricants can be used for anal stimulation as long as a condom wont be needed later during anal or vaginal intercourse.
Try Different Types of Fabric:
If clothing is worn then you may turn off the shallow rapidly adapting and hair follicle sensors and allow for different types of sensation. Some women may prefer foreplay with their underwear on, as girls/women often learn to masturbate with their panties on, and as a result direct stimulation of their vulva/clitoris doesn't work for them. What this means is, don't be so eager to get a woman out of her cloths! The type of fabric the clothing is made from will change the sensations experienced, in part because of how much pressure you must apply to reach the threshold of sensation. The texture of the fabric is also important to consider, as it alters how the sensors are stimulated; the ribbing of corduroy will produce stimulation that is different from that produced by cotton or denim. You can also cover the vulva and other body areas with plastic food wrap to accomplish the same, and applying lubricant under the plastic wrap will also alter the sensations experienced.
Experiment with Different Materials and Textures:
You can stimulate the skin with items made of different materials having various textures and hardnesses. Walk around your home, yard, or the local store and locate items that you can stimulate your own or a partner's body with, items that would be safe to insert into your mouth. If it is safe to insert the item into your mouth, even if you wouldn't eat it, then that most likely means it is clean and doesn't have any sharp edges, etc. Go through your closet and dresser and find clothing made from different materials; cotton underwear, leather belt, rubber rain wear, denim pants, silk shirt, nylon pantyhose, soft camisoles, wool socks, etc. In the bathroom grab your brush, comb, bottles, cotton swabs and balls, luffa [loofah] sponge, terrycloth towel, etc. In the kitchen, grab a butter knife, a spoon, a fork, a glass, some ice cubes, etc. From the yard get some grass clippings, flowers, leaves, smooth stones, etc. Please note that what works on the skin of the arms and legs may not work on the vulva and clitoris, due to differences in skin types and sensitivity, but using additional lubrication will likely increase the number of items you can use to stimulate all of these areas, as the lubricant will protect the tissues. The intent is to cause physically pleasurable sensations. You will want to explore ways of activating the sensors and causing the woman to feel something, rather than feeling numb. It isn't strictly about sexual pleasure and orgasm, as pleasurable sensations must come first.
Try Different Temperatures:
Use warm and/or cool liquids and objects to create a temperature change. It is important to remember that the temperature sensors are slowly adapting so applying a constant temperature probably will not work effectively. The warm or cool items must be moved about in a slow rhythmic manner. You can use ice cubes, or place objects in warm or cool water to cool them down or to warm them up, being careful not to get them too hot or cold; see the temperature ranges listed in the table shown above. Warm things up with your breath, cool them down with ice, for example; never apply ice to a body area for more than a few seconds at a time to prevent frostbite. A cooking thermometer will allow you to monitor the temperature of the liquid. I found digital food thermometers listed on the internet for less than $15 and dial ones of around $10. The smooth "handle" of a metal butter knife might be a suitable item to use to warm up or cool down. A clean and smooth stone or peeled potato wrapped in plastic wrap can be used, because of they store thermal energy when warmed or cooled. My guess is, that by itself thermal stimulation will provide pleasant stimulation but it may not provide stimulation that is intense enough to increase sexual arousal to the point of orgasm, but don't dismiss it because of this fact, as pleasure is extremely important to the sexual experience.
Use Flowing Water to Stimulate:
The water pulsating from a water massager or tub faucet may provide the most complex form of stimulation possible, as it incorporates different levels of pressure, rhythm, and temperature. It is perhaps the most ideal form of genital stimulation for many women, though it doesn't work for all and this is of no fault of their own. Water spray was being used by doctors beginning in the 1700s, if not before, to bring about orgasms in women to treat "hysteria." Water is firm without being hard, and you can independently control its temperature, the frequency of the water pulses, and the pressure. When water flows across the skin it does so without creating much in the way of friction, which might work well for women who find light caresses uncomfortable; they need the pressure without the friction, meaning you may have to turn off the shallow adaptive sensors. Women and couples should consider getting a handheld massaging shower head for their bathroom. You can put candles and other decorations in the bathroom to make it more romantic, and perhaps acquire some form of padding for the floor and the bottom of the tub to make things more comfortable. Don't limit your sexual experiences to the bedroom!
Experiment with Vibrations:
While a powerful two speed vibrator like the Hitachi Magic Wand may work wonders for many women, others may find that one that allows for more control over the speed of the motor, and as a result the frequency of the vibrations, will work much better. As the table shown above indicates, each sensor type is sensitive to a specific vibratory frequency range. This means the types of sensors within a given area of the body will determine what the tissues are sensitive to. This may explain why some women report vibrators simply don't work for them, but what this may actually mean is, the one they tried isn't the correct one for them, or the part of the body they applied it too. In general, the external skin surfaces tend to be most sensitive to stimulation with a vibrator, but internal stimulation, cervical stimulation for example, may result in orgasm for some women, even those with paralysis and nerve damage to their spinal cord. While vibrators can be relatively expensive, many are available for less than $10 online, and perhaps inexpensively at your local mall novelty store like Spencer's.
Rhythmic Compression:
Another form of stimulation involves tapping or spanking. Each of these incorporates pressure and rhythm without friction, and may involve a minor amount of localized skin irritation, as indicated by increased redness of the skin. In it's simplest form this may involve stimulating the clitoris by lightly tapping it rhythmically with a finger or two. Start out with a very slow rhythm and then very very slowly increasing the rhythm, while being careful not to increase the pressure of the taps. You want the rhythm to provide the stimulation rather than the pressure of the physical contact with the skin. Some of the shared masturbation techniques presented on this website utilize this technique, at least in the initial arousal stage. This may be done on bare skin or with different types of clothing on. Once arousal has been achieved, through whatever means works best, lightly spanking the entire vulva with your bare hand may provide pleasant stimulation that is a tiny bit shocking, in an enjoyable way. Start out using the tips of all your fingers, then try using your entire hand, again going very slowly and using light pressure, but then very slowly increasing the pressure and rhythm. The amount of hair present on the vulva will influence the sensations experience, and this may work best when the hair is trimmed short or removed, at least on the outer labia. Please note that you want to stimulate the vulva rather than punish it, i.e. cause injury or pain. Now, this isn't something you should try doing without discussing it with your partner beforehand, unless of course you are doing this while masturbating alone. The receiving partner will need to indicate what feels good at the time, and when they want more or less stimulation, or to stop. You can use these techniques on other areas of the body too, like the thighs, buttocks, and breasts, and practice on them, before trying them on the more sensitive clitoris and vulva. You can also buy small soft paddles and whips to do this with, but please read up on the appropriate technique for their use before using them on yourself or a partner, as they can quickly cause injury. You should use these items playfully rather than to cause intense sensations or possible injury.
Learn From the Shared Techniques and Experiences
If you are wanting to learn additional ways of stimulating your erogenous zones, please read through the hundreds of masturbation techniques women have shared. They utilize a lot of different techniques, which result in a lot of different types of stimulation. These greatly varied techniques demonstrate the enormous amount of diversity in women, and what works best for them. Consider the types of stimulation created by the individual techniques, and how you can duplicate it during your solo or partnered sexual experiences.
Continued in Part 4 - Overcoming Challenges
Video Instruction on Sexual Stimulation
Note #1: I believe some women induce orgasm by intentionally creating tension in their pelvic and leg muscles that the brain interprets as being caused by sexual stimulation and arousal. This muscle tension is often caused by squeezing the legs together, or by grasping objects between them, say a door, pole, playground equipment, or tree.
Stimulation of erogenous zones results in muscular tension that when it reaches an appropriate level triggers orgasm. An orgasm is comprised of rhythmic muscular contractions that releases the muscle tension and pooled blood within the pelvic and genital organs. The sensors that detect this muscular tension, which are different from the sensors in our skin, probably don't know if the muscular tension is created by sexual stimulation or intentional muscular contraction. Regardless of the cause of the tension, the sensors probably send the same signal to the brain or pattern generator.
Women who have "tension orgasms" may shortcut the arousal process, they practically go straight to orgasm. Having learned this, they may not be able to process sexual stimulation in the way that other women do. The sensations they experience during sexual arousal are so different from what they expect and are accustomed to that it doesn't work for them. For these women, sexual arousal may not be required for orgasm to occur, and their mind and body may reject it as foreign and unnecessary. If this is true, they may have to retrain their mind and body to accept the process of sexual arousal, and the resulting slow build up of muscular tension, if they are to experience orgasm through sexual stimulation of their erogenous zones.
As desirable as instantaneous orgasms may sound, this method of achieving orgasm doesn't work so well when it comes to partnered sexual experiences, nor more relaxed and drawn out forms of self pleasure.
